One Year Closer…..

Adoptive Couple Vs Baby Girl

The problem with adoptive parents is that they don’t ‘get’ the problem. I went into this journey having no experience in adoption with no adopted family members and having no thoughts of adopting. I was ‘adoption stupid’ so to speak. And in such a short amount of time, I’ve learned so much. Then again, I was open to where it would take me. I didn’t walk into this with any expectations as many on one side of the table or the other often do. Most walk into adoption as either the ‘giver’ or the ‘wanter’ and bring their expectations and experiences with them. I, having none and no wish list or expectations from it, was open to go where ever that path took me. In that way, I believe I’ve seen so much honesty from the whole experience, more even than those who are part of an adoption in some ways.

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Why Veronica Brown Will Not Be Swept Under the Rug

It has been almost a year since Veronica Brown (now Veronica Capobianco) was forcibly removed from her father and her stepmother on Cherokee land.

Tulsa World posted a small picture of a smiling beautiful four year old in a pink shirt, a child happy at her fourth birthday party, taken less than two weeks before her world was shattered.

Her world was shattered not because her family was neglecting her.   They didn’t remove her because her family was abusing her, but they removed her because a family “wanted her more.”   In fact, they even went so far as to claim that Dusten would change her mind and not want her again, and that was why they had to remove her from her family.

As far as I’m concerned ICWA should not have even had to be a factor in this case, but due to what I consider unconstitutional laws in South Carolina, it was the only way that Dusten had a chance to keep his daughter.    A mother can manipulate the system in South Carolina and it is a perfectly acceptable way to bypass the father’s rights.

And what of Matthew and Melanie Capobianco?   Pulling a child away from her biological parents with no real need to do so proved only that they are unfit parents.   Add on the dual transition plan – http://adoptivecouplevsbabygirl.wordpress.com/2013/10/01/give-us-our-prize-and-our-money-too/ – linked up here and their goals seemed more on winning than about what was in their child’s best interest.

Now, they want privacy, they demand that everyone leave them alone, but I don’t see how this is possible – because Matthew and Melanie Capobianco are now the poster parents for unethical adoption.   According to the courts what they did was legal, though that being said, there are some extreme doubts on this point, but ethical?      Attempting to adopt a child without notifying the father?   When the mother said that the father was Cherokee, but information came back to the contrary why did they not press this?    Why didn’t they make sure that what they were doing was ethical?

And why didn’t they just step back and say, “No, we’re leaving this child with her father” when Veronica clearly didn’t remember them?   Or were they so sure that they were the only ones that cared for her and therefore had drunk the CAICW kool-aid that a native family was incapable of caring for their children.   Indeed, they have proven themselves unfit to take care of ANY multiracial child by spending so much time publicly saying that any part of her heritage wasn’t enough to matter.

There indeed is one of the ultimate ironies in this case, the CAICW, the aforementioned “Christian” Alliance for Indian Child Welfare, pulling a child from her Christian family to be raised by a childless ATHEIST couple.   An ATHEIST COUPLE.    How you want to live your life is your own business but the implication here is that an atheist white family is going to be more suitable than a native family.    Combine this with the recent discussion on the CAICW’s website and you’re getting a recipe for finding out that Lisa Morris’s actions speak much louder than she perhaps intended.

CAICWNatives1 CAICWNatives2

By the way Lisa Morris, yes you can speak for YOUR family but you don’t speak for native everywhere.   And you don’t speak for the multiracial children like many are.   They want to stay connected to their families too.   Contrary to what Jessica Munday and her ilk say, they ARE a racist organization.    And they don’t speak for multiracial children, they don’t speak for natives and they DEFINITELY do not speak for Christians.

(And as a side note, I WILL explain later about why she is wrong about ICWA and will include documentation that does not include tribal government conspiracy theory)

So why won’t any of us let the Veronica case go?

Because of these fathers, proving that this fight has to continue until these men get their children back.

Rob Manzanares – https://www.facebook.com/helpRobManzanares

Trent Reicks – https://www.facebook.com/bringtrentsbabygirlhome – his case is in desperate need of funds right now – http://www.gofundme.com/ec5lc8 is the link to his gofundme site – he’s fighting the county district attorney to get his daughter back.

Anthony Lingle – https://www.facebook.com/BringHaileyHome – this man got the adoption overturned as a thwarted father, now has to share custody with a failed adoptive parent.

Brandon Owen, a soldier – https://www.facebook.com/pages/Standing-Our-Ground-for-Olivia-Rose-Owen/

And there are so many more.

What happened to Dusten Brown did not just affect him, it affected every father that is fighting to get their children back from an illegal or unethical adoption.

And because of the awareness this case brought, the following positive outcomes have occurred.

1.  Desirai Simmons is back with her father and grandmother.

2.   A team working with John McCaul, Sonya’s father, was able to more quickly combat the PR team that worked on Veronica’s case.    The wheels of justice move slowly but they will turn.
3.   Elle, a young foster child in Washington was able to very quickly be pulled away from the limelight.   This is a victory for her privacy.

We won’t let up about Veronica until the wrongs have been righted and she knows that ALL of her story is online to see.

A Child Truly In Need

http://nihaoyall.com/2014/09/going-all-out.html

This is a case where a child is truly in need of a new family.   In China, children that are different are ostracized and she is not going to function well in institutional care.

This is an adoption that is ethical and above board.     I hope that some of my readers can support this cause.